Picking and Choosing

Then Hezekiah said to Isaiah, “The word of the Lord that you have spoken is good.” For he thought, “There will be peace and security in my days.”-Isaiah 39:8

About that time Herod the king laid violent hands on some who belonged to the church. He killed James the brother of John with the sword, and when he saw that it pleased the Jews, he proceeded to arrest Peter also. This was during the days of Unleavened Bread. And when he had seized him, he put him in prison, delivering him over to four squads of soldiers to guard him, intending after the Passover to bring him out to the people. So Peter was kept in prison, but earnest prayer for him was made to God by the church.-Acts 12:1-5

Hey everyone! It's been a while since I have written on here. College homework has made me very busy. I wanted to write this blog post because God has been teaching me about it throughout this semester, and it has helped me to be healed of my anxiety.

A few months ago, over the summer, I had a very difficult time relaxing.  I had severe acid reflux, which definitely did not calm my fear of throwing up.  Throughout the summer, God asked me if I really trusted Him.  If I really trusted Him, why did I still struggle with anxiety? To what degree did I trust God?  If I sing "I will follow you wherever you go" during the worship service at church, but refuse to eat food because I might get sick, how deep is my trust?

Today in church, we talked about Acts 12.  Within the same passage, two of Jesus' best friends on Earth each had completely different fates.  James, Jesus' own brother, died, while Peter was put in prison.  Those who are familiar with the passage know that Peter was later miraculously released from prison.  Why was Peter spared, but not James?  I wonder if James knew that he was going to die the way that he did.  I wonder what he would say if he knew that Peter was able to live, but he had to die before the Church even began to go global. 

God calls us to do His work, but He does not give us an exact detailed plan of what He has for us to do in the future.  He gives you a task, but He does not always explain why or how He wants you to accomplish it. It's possible that you may not even see the fruits of your obedience to God in this lifetime.  When you say "Where you go, I'll go...I will follow you," what are you really saying?

To be honest, for a long time, I only trusted God when I saw that He was doing good things for me.  I only believed that God was the healer when I did not feel sick.  I only believed that God could save me when I was safe and sound in my house.  I only believed that God would never leave me when I was surrounded by friends.  However, when I felt sick, I abandoned God and found other ways to cope with my illness.  When I was placed out of my comfort zone, I complained and wondered where God was.  When my friends left me, I cried because I felt alone.  I would pray: "God, I give you control of my life.  No matter what happens, I will trust you." But when things got difficult, God was the first thing I abandoned.

In the book of Isaiah, Hezekiah offers great evidence of trust in the Lord.  Isaiah prophesied over Hezekiah, the king of Israel during this time.  He said that there would be a time when all of his possessions, and some of his family members, would be taken into Babylon.  Babylon was an enemy to Israel when Hezekiah was king.  Throughout the Old Testament, God promises to bring prosperity and success to the Israelites; He promises to deliver the Israelites from their enemies.  Hezekiah had been faithful to God all of his life, and he had seen God's miracles while serving as king.  As a matter of fact, in Isaiah 38, God added fifteen years to Hezekiah's life because of his faithfulness to the Lord.  

When Isaiah prophesied destruction over Hezekiah, I could only imagine what is going through Hezekiah's head.  Hezekiah had served God his entire life.  He deserved a happy ending.  In response to this prophecy, Hezekiah said to Isaiah: "The word of the LORD that you have spoken is good."  Instead of complaining that God was unjust, Hezekiah accepted this message.  "For he thought, 'There will be peace and security in my days'" (v. 9).  Hezekiah had seen the miracles of God throughout his life.  He knew that God had the ability to save Israel.  However, instead of wondering why God was allowing the Babylonians to take over Israel, Hezekiah trusted that, one day, there will be peace and security again.

What happens to you when you are removed from your comfort zone?  Do you abandon God, or do you trust that God will not let you see decay?  It is dangerous to pray "I will follow you wherever you go" and not mean it.  When you say that you love God, you are saying that you love everything about God, even the things that you do not understand.  When you say that you will trust God, you are saying that you will trust God even if His plan does not make sense at the time.  Do not just trust God when things look good.  Be like Hezekiah, and trust that God will provide peace and security even through the difficult times.